Tag Archives: gold

I feel naked…

…and not in a good way!

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So when is it OK and not OK to be naked…for me I love getting my kit off, probably because I am an exhibitionist, or more to the truth, I really do like to kick back and shed the weekday attire and feel the sand between my toes and the elements on my skin, but that naked is OK…I am asking about the feeling you have when someone you have looked up to and aspire to be as good as if not better turns out to be….well to quote a phrase ‘not all that’

I guess the only way I could feel any more naked is if, there were others.

Thousands of people pose in the nude for

Others, who on the outside or from a distance have a good ‘show’ a presence, a swagger, a reputation and integrity.
OH NO…it has happened….Like Icarus, I clearly got to close…and substance – missing, ability – lacking and integrity – do not pass go, do not collect £200.
So there I am about to spiral…now which way do I go…?
Up and risk the ego taking over?
Or down and risk the ever too faithful human sabotage take over…Oh wait there is another way…of course there is…because I AM CONGRUENT.

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Congruent I hear you ask? Yes, Congruent. A mid-15th century Latin word Congruentum meaning ‘to come together, agree, correspond with’ A word that I use regularly with clients and myself. To me it means simply this. For me to be the best coach I can be, I need to be coached.

I need to understand how it feels when someone holds the mirror up and I am there, looking in, squirming…
I need to understand how I feel when I am being questioned about what I have or haven’t done to result in what I currently have or am.
I need to understand how empowered I feel when I am aided in reaching the point I need to reach to make it happen
I need to create my own solutions and have someone who I can bounce off, an outside voice who will not be my ‘yes man’ and help me see how it really is….
..Show me when challenges need facing and when brilliance exactly that, brilliance.

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So I turn to my coach, I am naked (they don’t laugh, which is also a bonus!!) and I share what I am feeling, a little lost. Something has knocked me sideways and I can quite place it…See that is the beauty of having a coach and being coached…a voice at the end of a phone or a welcome face over a coffee to listen, questions, facilitate and empower me.
I had begun to think my ego had gone and got way out of hand…I am no shrinking violet I know that, but what I was witnessing, experiencing, was mentors and business professionals who I looked up to and admired, possibly even to aspired to be, behaving in ways I never imagined I would experience. Then I began to think, maybe it’s not that, maybe it’s that my compass was way off and I had been looking in the wrong places or looking for the wrong things…
What transpires is simple. It is something I am very aware of and many reading this will be too…and there it is folks…the best learning’s are the life lessons that keep showing us that we are alive, they are not complicated or scientific, they are simple, powerful and right there.
We are a constant.
That was it…where I was years ago, to where I am now, where my mentors were to where they are now is just different. Not better, not worse, just different.
What I wanted then and was getting out of bed for then is not what drives me now.

And here is my compass.
I am here to inspire, educate and motivate.
To encourage the world to think and act differently, one step at a time.
I help people believe. And if you wish to dismiss that, then go and try something that you don’t believe and let me know how you get on!
My ethics and my morals bound me to only do what is right for me and my clients. I choose the game now and I can play to the level that I want, that I choose.
My mission is to help you realise the game you wish to play and importantly the level that you want to play it at.
Because life is just a game. A beautiful, emotional, passionate, romantic, harsh, humorous & real game. Step up to the plate, pick up a bat and swing…you can’t win if you don’t swing the bat, that is a fact.

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So I am extremely grateful to the path that I have chosen and the routes that it takes me every week…burning new pathways, establishing new relationships and building new opportunities to make this world better, one step at a time.
I am grateful to my coach and my clients, past present and future.
I am grateful for my health and every day that I am given to get up and make it happen.
Whatever you do, do it to your best and the best will find you back.

When you are ready to take the bat and start winning…call me. The Congruent Coach. +44(0) 1792 911881

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We’re all cracked pots!

A water bearer in India had two large pots, each hung on each end of a pole which he carried across his neck.

One of the pots had a crack in it, and while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water at the end of the long walk from the stream to the master’s house, the cracked pot arrived only half full.

 

For a full 2 years this went on daily, with the bearer delivering only one and a half pots full of water in his master’s house.

 

Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments, perfect to the end for which it was made.

 

But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection, and miserable that it was able to accomplish only half of what it had been made to do.

 

After 2 years of what it perceived to be a bitter failure, it spoke to the water bearer one day by the stream.

 

“I am ashamed of myself, and I want to apologize to you.”

 

“Why?” asked the bearer.  “What are you ashamed of?”

 

“I have been able, for these past two years, to deliver only half my load because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your master’s house.  Because of my flaws, you have to do all of this work, and you don’t get full value from your efforts,” the pot said.

 

The water bearer felt sorry for the old cracked pot, and in his compassion he said, “As we return to the master’s house, I want you to notice the beautiful flowers along the path.”

Indeed as they went up the hill, the old cracked pot took notice of the sun warming the beautiful wild flowers on the side of the path and this cheered it some.  But at the end of tile trail, it still felt bad because it had leaked out half its load, and so again it apologized to the bearer for its failure.

 

The bearer said to the pot, “Did you notice that there were flowers only on YOUR side of your path, but not on the other pot’s side?  That’s because I have always known about your flaw, and I took advantage of it.  I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back from the stream, you’ve watered them.

 

For 2 years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate my master’s table.  Without you being just the way you are, he would not have this beauty to grace his house.”

 

Moral: Each of us has our own unique flaws.  We’re all cracked pots.

 

Some of us don’t grow old gracefully, some are not so smart, some are tall, large & big, some bald, some physically challenged, but it’s the cracks and flaws we each have that make our lives together so very interesting and rewarding.

 

You’ve just got to take each person for what they are, and look for the good in them.  There is a lot of good out there.  There is a lot of good in you.

Blessed are the flexible for they shall not be bent out of shape.  Remember to appreciate all the different people in your life!  Or as I like to think of it – If it’s not for the crackpots in my life, it would be pretty boring.

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Do you want a shag?

Do you want a shag?

 

Simple question really…so do you?

Picture the scene or scenes

You are at home, maybe working from home if you have built that lifestyle for yourself. Maybe you are busy looking after the children or maybe just at home, because you can be, at home.

The phone rings, there is a 2-3 second silence after you say “Hello”…then you hear a click and some background noise (recognise this so far) this is the realm of call centre cold calling…the trouble is, they are calling YOU!

Then without any warning the voice on the end of the phone states clearly and with no introduction…”Do you want a shag?”

How would you react? What would you think or do? What in god’s name does this individual believe he is actually going to achieve by doing this?

Or scene two…you are on your sofa, glass of vino nearby, the laptop warming your thighs….you social butterfly you, busy Tweeting, Facebooking, Blogging, Beboing…and suddenly your laptop pings….

It’s a contact you added on Facebook a while ago, you weren’t too sure if you knew this person but you share so many friends that you must, so you accepted and forgot.

Out of the blue they have messaged you and said simply “Hi”

Now you are thinking, “OMG, I don’t remember them! How did I know this person? What was our connection? It’s been so long, shall I apologise for not saying hello sooner?

And then he hits you with it….

“Do you want a shag?”

WTF…did he really just ask me that….or am I going mad….I rub my eyes…and its still there, however its changed slightly…now it reads:

“Hey buddy, when you get 5 minutes please like this new page – http://www.facebook.com/some-nobs-fanpage”

Or

“Hey do you want to know how I went from zero to earning £10,000 a month, click here http://www.ripoffmugs.com

What happened to taking someone for a drink? Finding out what music or films they like and maybe taking them to see one or two and walking them home! Building up to and eventually earning the right to go the 10%/90% while the other goes 90%/10% (male/female reader delete as appropriate) and finally planting that kiss….waiting for the front door to shut and then jumping around like Tom Cruise on Oprahs couch.

And guess what, not always when you pan for gold will you strike….but the more you pan, the more chance you have. (the real clever folk stop panning for gold and just focus their energy on making the pans!) and when you do strike it will happen naturally because it is right, you have earned it, there is mutual synergy between both parties. The other party has interest in your product and wants to buy…..you are your product.

**OMG as I am typing this at 22:38 Friday evening, someone has just pinged me and offered me the chance to win an ipod….check my details you Moron…I am in Telecoms!

So for all you SMM’s out there….you PR’s….FF’s and TT’s I have news for you, as you clearly believe that sales is purely a numbers game and no one has ever taken you deeper to understand how we buy as human beings. Maybe they have and you just didn’t listen.

Either way you have missed some key basics:

  • I am a person
  • People buy from People
  • People do not like being sold to
  • People do love to buy
  • People love to be courted
  • People hate being molested

Strong words perhaps, strong emotions associated with them perhaps….and one other thing, strong evidence to show that unless you lift your game, get off your ass and learn how to become great at professionally helping people buy (true definition of selling)

Or you can remain a bottom feeder, harrassing, chasing and wasting resource to get little in return.

Sales is about people, social media is simply a tool just like the phone was all those years ago when sales people were out in the rain knocking doors (for you younger ones, yes we actually did do that, but boy did we at least earn the sale). See it as just that. A tool to help escalate you to greater things, to do that however you first must master people.

To find out more, to invest in yourself and begin again….then come find me

Facebook  https://www.facebook.com/pages/Applying-You/368542120423

Twitter http://twitter.com/#!/applyingyou

P.S. If you want to find out what SMM’s PR’s FF’s and TT’s are you will have to get in touch

 

Now that is worth thinking about!

 

Applying You  – You; Simply Better

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